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Showing posts with label Aimee. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Aimee. Show all posts

Thursday, September 11, 2014

MMM Library: 9-11 Remembrances



by Seattle Jon:


What do you remember? Leave a comment ...

Seattle Jon
I was an investment banker in Baltimore on 9-11. I was at my desk when the first and second planes hit the towers. I remember the guy who sat across from me (he was also LDS) turning around and saying, "Hey, there are planes hitting buildings in New York." When the third plane hit the Pentagon, he turned around again and said, "Dude ... I think this is the end of the world." His statement sent chills through me. Soon after, we went down to the trading floor where we watched both towers fall on fifty television screens. It was horrifying to think what our headquartered colleagues across the street from the towers were going through. Baltimore essentially shut down, and I was only able to get out of the city because I knew a few cabbies. I spent the next few days glued to the news, worrying about my wife and daughter in Utah.

Scott Heffernan
I was on a mission in Bristol, England on 9/11. We happened to be tracting door-to-door when the attacks began. We knocked on a woman’s door, introduced ourselves as missionaries, and she curtly told us she was not interested. As we were walking away she said, “Wait…Have you seen what’s going on?...I think you better come in.” We watched her TV in shock and confusion as the first tower burned, a plane crashed into the second tower, and then both towers collapsed. It was a heavy, heavy day and the mission changed a great deal after that.

Friday, August 8, 2014

MMM Library: The Birds & the Bees (& Babies)



by Aimee:


As a marriage and family therapist (and someone who just enjoys chatting about the subject), I hear a lot of couples discuss their struggles with getting back into the intimacy groove once the baby(ies) joins the family. As a new mom, an article titled Sex and The Baby Years really helped me get my head back in the game a few weeks after having our baby boy.

The CNN Health author, Ian Kerner, takes a fun, realistic approach on the issue of sexuality for couples after babies. One of my favorite lines from the article reads:
We believe that sex matters. It’s the glue that binds couples together. It’s what makes us more than just friends. Without sex, lovers become roommates, and a bedroom becomes just a place to sleep in (often with a kid or two in it as well).
Amen. Sex matters! A lot. And as committed couples, working hard to make sex an enjoyable, safe and pleasant experience can make all the difference in our overall health.

Also note the great advice for dads (hint: Don't Give Up!) and the direct, healthy advice for moms in point number four.

This post was originally published August 5, 2011.

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Raised by a self-declared "Zen Mormon,” Aimee was exposed to a unique, open approach to mormonism. This allows her to easily relate to people of all different backgrounds. She will be contributing to Modern Mormon Men with her insights as a marriage and family therapist and has the great pleasure of writing on topics regarding mental and emotional health, parenting, couplehood, sexuality, and anything else she sees fit to share. Aimee served a mission in the beautiful countryside of Sendai, Japan. She graduated from Seattle Pacific University and practices in Redmond, Washington. She loves her (above-average) charming husband and son. Aimee is world renowned for her parallel parking skills and vertical leap. If you ever run into her, she will be happy to demonstrate either.
 photo Line-625_zpse3e49f32.gifImage credit: Charlotte (used with permission).

Saturday, June 28, 2014

Another Modern Mormon Man Born



MMM co-founder Scott Heffernan and his wife Aimee welcomed another boy yesterday (that makes three). Perhaps his recent Big Tent illustration wasn't about room for all in the church after all, but was instead a reminder to buy a bigger tent for when he takes his family camping. Anyway, congratulations Scott and Aimee!

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

The Saratov Approach




In 1998, two Mormon missionaries were kidnapped and held for ransom in Saratov, Russia. The Saratov Approach opens in Utah theaters October 9th. Watch the trailer and visit the Facebook page.

Recently the MMM team was given the opportunity to view an advanced screening of The Saratov Approach. Here are our reviews.

Scott Hales
Mormon cinema, like Mormon literature, doesn't have a great reputation. Sometimes it surprises us with a really fantastic film, like Napoleon Dynamite or Brigham City or Saints and Soldiers, but most of the time that's not the case. Most of the time we get a comedy or a pioneer movie that seems like a roadshow with a budget. Maybe that's an exaggeration, but to be honest, I've been a little underwhelmed by a lot of recent Mormon films.

When I got the chance to preview The Saratov Approach, a recent film about the real-life 1998 kidnappings of two missionaries in Russia, I worried that it would leave me underwhelmed as well--despite its compelling premise and fantastic trailer. I'm happy to report, though, that The Saratov Approach gives me hope in the future of Mormon cinema. Like the best Mormon films, it strikes a nice balance between the gritty and the uplifting. It testifies of gospel principles without detracting from the realities that make life challenging for peoples and communities. It also reminds us that life is the outcome of an ongoing chain of choices that asks us what kind of person we want to be. In this film, we get characters--kidnappers--who make terrible choices even though they are initially motivated by righteous desires. We also get Missionaries who struggle to be Christ-like to their captors when every instinct seems to compel them to do otherwise.

Mormon films like The Saratov Approach are not made very often. However, when they are, they remind us of the great things that can happen when we take ourselves, our stories, and our faith seriously.

Kyle
Whenever I hear about a "Mormon movie" I groan and roll my eyes, and with good reason. The catalog of Mormon-themed movies isn't exactly spectacular/award-winning and leaves much to be desired in both script and production quality. So, when I sat down to watch this movie, I braced myself for another eye-rolling experience. I couldn't have been more wrong.

Friday, January 11, 2013

MMM Library: This Is Not a Post About Swinging



by Aimee (bio)

This post was originally published on May 12, 2011.

Before I got married, I didn’t realize how complicated finding married friends would be as a couple.

The ladies need to like each other.
The men need to like each other.
I need to like the guy of the couple.
My husband needs to like the girl.
And the same goes for them.
They both need to like both of us back.
The same rules apply for our same-sex couple friends too. 

Once married, you think you have been released from the dating world, but little do you know that you have merely graduated into a whole new world of dating.

Couple Dating.
(And you thought dating alone was hard?)

Finding successful couple friends is an art form. Everyone needs to genuinely like each other in order for it to be a successful couple friendship that will last a lifetime…the kind of friendship where you get choked up at their children's weddings.

"How did the kids grow up so fast?" {tear}

This may seem like it would be easy to find, but in the real world, couple dating is a complicated, delicate, relational, and highly important marital matter.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

My Sister Missionary Wish List



by Aimee (bio)


If Twitter, Facebook, and my text message activity are indicators of the excitement about the news regarding the new missionary age policy change, then it seems members are THRILLED about this announcement. Mormon social media was blowing up and there have been a number of fantastic articles discussing the cultural ripples this age change will have on our community (articles here, here, and here). This change means a lot to girls who can now leave when they turn 19 instead of 21. So much can happen in those two years! This earlier opportunity could drastically impact where a woman's life goes.

My friend, a dental hygienist in Lehi, told me that since last week there has been TONS of young ladies in her chair getting their dental exams for their mission papers. I've seen multiple Facebook statuses with young women announcing their plans to go, and my dad, who teaches early morning seminary, said the girls in the class talked about how this changes everything for their senior year of seminary. It looks like the ball is already rolling for the world to be flooded with more sisters! This excites me as I have a special place in my heart for sister missionaries. I think they are valuable beyond measure to the missionary efforts.

Since this announcement I have thought a lot about my mission. With the increase of sisters going on missions, and the ratio of elders to sisters balancing out, I have a few hopes I want to share about mission dynamics. A wish list of sorts.

Here we go.

1) More leadership opportunities.
I would hope to see the mission leadership structure changing to include more sisters. Honestly, I was glad sisters didn't have to get into the subtle political gaming that went on with some elders. We all know that elder who was running for AP and it really just seemed like it would be way too much energy. That being said, there were times that I wished I was able to break up the monotony of our day-to-day routine by traveling to see other missionaries and working with them in their areas like many district leaders, zone leaders, and assistants were able to do. The temple square sisters have leadership positions; clearly there is not a priesthood requirement. If the idea is to have sisters and elders serving "shoulder to shoulder," I think there could be some great changes to make this feel true.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Giveaway 13: Real Intimacy Book Launch



by Aimee (bio)

I have super good news! 
I have been teaching the marriage and family relations class in my ward. It has been a really fun calling and I am surprised that, with my job as a marriage therapist, this is the first time I have taught the class.

This isn't the good news yet.
The third lesson includes a section header reading "Proper intimacy in marriage is an expression of love." Since I have a speciality of working with issues of sexuality in my practice, I took the liberty of dedicating a whole class on the subject of intimacy and sex. I was a little nervous going into the class because it's not everyday you throw down words about sex during the Sunday School hour. I am happy to say that my class was super open and responded really well to the discussion. (Yeah Bothell 1st Ward couples!)

But this is still not the good news I referred to in the first sentence of this post. (Stick with me!)
It saddens me to see that the manual has only one paragraph about intimacy and sex. ONE! I have to confess, I see too much sexual dysfunction with members of the church (this could be a whole other post) and I feel passionate that we need more information on the subject of intimacy, sexuality, and experiencing more healthy interactions with our spouses. Most members do not feel comfortable reading books outside of LDS authors so our options are slim pickins' when it comes to recommendations. There are only a few LDS books written on the subject. 

And now for the great news. (Thanks for your patience, friends.) 
I was able to get my hands on an advance reader's copy of the book being launched today called Real Intimacy: A Couple's Guide to Healthy, Genuine Sexuality. As I was reading, I believe I heard angels singing in the background. With chapters regarding understanding your sexual history, creating conversations, and guilt, shame, and secrecy with sexuality, the therapist inside me sung for joy. These are the topics that need to be written about! These are the honest conversations we need to be having about intimacy! We need frank, direct, open education on how we can be showing up better in our Mormon marriages, and the book does just that. No more divorces over this issue. No. More. Divorces. This book is a blessing to our people, people. A blessing I tell you. Get reading today. I promise it will be a great addition to your book collection. And it is really fun to read. Your wife or husband will like it too. I promise. 

You knew it was coming...
Guess who said we get to giveaway a book?! That's right. The authors got some book giveaway love and we want you to win.

Giveaway Guidelines:
• You have THREE chances to enter. Each option requires a SEPARATE comment.
   - Leave a general comment.
   - Like the MMM Facebook page or share the giveaway on Facebook. Leave a comment saying you did.
   - Share the giveaway via Twitter or follow MMM on Twitter. Leave a comment saying you did.

• You have 7 days to enter (closes Tuesday, August 21st at midnight).
• Winner chosen via random.org and announced Wednesday, August 22nd.
• Winner must respond via email with their address by Friday, August 24th to claim the book.

And in the meantime check out their links:

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

9 Eyes



by Aimee (bio)

Have you ever peeked at Jon Rafman's Tumblr, 9-eyes.com? He collects artistic, interesting, random images from Google street view. 9 Eyes refers to the nine directional cameras to capture the 360° views on each of the google maps vehicles. I am amazed at what he finds and posts. Can you imagine all the still shots he must weed through to find some of these gems? His work is an act of love just so I can get a little eye candy every time he posts in my Google reader.

Whenever I see a Google car I get excited. I so rarely see one that when I do I declare it my lucky day. Have you ever street-viewed your house? My father-in-law made it into their street view which thrills me every time I look. 

The raw world as art. Lovely, no? Here are a few of my favorites from 9 Eyes. For more images click here. 






And as a tribute to my childhood and because I wish I could still get away with toilet papering ...

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Giveaway 11: Poprocks Design



by Aimee (bio)


Primary songs have been a huge way in which I connect with the spirit. In times of trial, joy, difficulty and happiness, there is often an appropriate Primary song to use as my personal, spiritual soundtrack. My mom's favorite calling in church was being the Primary chorister, so from a young age the songs have found a home in my soul. History is being repeated when I sing my son the songs as I rock him to sleep, which I hope my children will do to their children and so on and so forth.

In a previous ward, I was the Primary secretary and I was in a particularly heavy season of life. One Sunday, the primary kids were singing My Heavenly Father Loves Me. The simple words powerfully reminded me of some of my favorite truths, making me teary-eyed and thankful for the beautiful world we have been given.

Sharing a love of hymns and Primary songs, Scott and I have created LDS-inspired, retro-style images based on our favorite Primary songs. Today, we want to give an image to a Modern Mormon Men reader.

The winner can choose any item from the PopRocks Design shop up to $36.

Giveaway Guidelines:
You have THREE chances to enter. Each entry requires a separate comment.
1. Leave a comment with the print you like best or your favorite primary song (anonymous comments ignored).
2. Like the PopRocks Design or Modern Mormon Men Facebook page. Or follow MMM on Twitter. Leave a comment here letting us know you did.
3. Share this giveaway post via Facebook or Twitter. Leave a comment here letting us know you did.

• 7 days to enter (closes Thursday, June 21st at midnight).
• Winner announced June 25th.
• Winner must respond via email with their image choice and mailing address by June 28th.

Can't wait? Use discount code MODERNMORMONMEN to receive 15% off.

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Vulnerability Is Not Weakness



by Aimee (bio)

BrenĂ© Brown continues to speak powerful words on shame, creativity, and vulnerability. If you missed her first TED Talk on vulnerability than I would suggest starting there before watching her newest edition, which I have embedded below.

I have all my clients watch  BrenĂ©'s first TED Talk because her research into how the feeling of shame is a universal experience is significant. Shame is connected with depression, anxiety, and a whole bunch of other unhealthy consequences. I tease many of my Mormon clients that I need a separate chair to put Mormon shame in because it takes up a lot of space in the room. No, Mormons, unfortunately, are not exempt from shame, and we often have our own unique issues with the feeling. In fact, Mormon Matters has a fantastic podcast addressing this very issue.

In Dr. Brown's most recent TED talk, she discusses the issue of gender and vulnerability. She talks about how men have a much harder time sharing their vulnerability for fear of being perceived as weak. And that message doesn't come from just fathers and coaches in their lives, but also women who do not like to see men show vulnerability. I hope to see this gender dynamic change as our culture gets more emotionally mature and fosters more empathy, as Dr. Brown discusses.

What are your thoughts? Do we as a church community allow each other to be vulnerable and open? Are Mormon men allowed to show vulnerability? Or is there a pressure to have it all together and be in control?

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

New MMM Baby



Future Modern Mormon Man
Grey (or GreyHeff), son of ScottHeff and Aimee, born March 2nd

Friday, January 13, 2012

Shamed: A Documentary Feature Film



by Aimee (bio)

As a marriage therapist, it is saddening how often I see a significant breakdown in relationships with my LDS couples due to pornography addiction. The biggest sorrow is the mistrust it breeds in so many aspects of their lives. The recovery to rebuild that trust takes a lot of time and work. I'm sure everyone reading this has a personal story attached with how pornography has affected you or someone close to you. Am I right?

Recently, a trailer was brought to my attention that addresses this issue in very direct, honest, and open way.

Shamed is a documentary in the works with hopes of telling stories regarding pornography addiction in order to look at how to remove the debilitating shame that exists around pornography and sexuality in conservative Christian communities. Shame is such a powerful emotion that often keeps people from truly healing and can end up doing much more harm than good.

Please check out the Shamed trailer below and then head over to their Kickstarter page. I believe it could be a very powerful, healing tool in helping families work through this addiction. Plus, I like watching quality films focused towards the community of people I love. The filmmakers financial goal is $40k and Kickstarter is an all or nothing platform on a deadline so clearly they need support. Small donations from a lot of people add up quickly so please consider giving what you can. 


Please click right here and give them your support! 
And if you are so inclined, spread the word so they can reach their goal.

Friday, December 23, 2011

The Labors Of The Nativity



by Aimee (bio)


Here is ScottHeff and me, 42 weeks pregnant and going on 23 hours of labor. Walking the neighborhood and climbing the stairs was our last-ditch effort to get this baby past seven centimeters. Otherwise, I had to report to the hospital from the birthing center. Little did we know we had 8 more long hours to go before we would officially become parents.

You can probably guess that we ended up at the hospital.

And now, 15 months later, as I look down at my belly and find myself ripe with child again, I can’t help but anticipate the next delivery ahead of us. Hopefully this one will go smoother (please, oh, please!). I am crossing my fingers that this baby comes spontaneously so I can try for a VBAC (apparently now called a TOLAC—Trial of Labor After Cesarean). If not, a c-section is not the worst thing in the world. Prepare yourself for the classic clichĂ©: All we really want is a healthy baby.

And we do.
Seriously.

Speaking of deliveries, did you see CJane’s beautiful post on their recent unassisted birth? It is worth a read. Articulate, relationally loving, spiritual, and body positive. She also had a post a few days later that mentioned the ultimate birth story of Mary, Joseph, and the baby Jesus. Her words combined with my state of  pregnancy during this season got me thinking ...

Who was there to see the Son of God take his first breaths and hear his sweet baby cries? Did they bring in a local Bethlehem midwife? Or did Joseph deliver the baby boy? If so, was this progressive of Joseph for the culture of the time? (Would we dare call him modern?)  Did someone teach him how to cut the cord? For some reason I love to picture him learning how to do that task. What an incredible man he must have been to be so trusting and to have so much faith in Mary that he would be by her side to deliver this baby (not his) with her.

Clearly, Joseph was one of the good ones.

And close beside the manger bed 
He dimmed the lantern's light, 
And held the little Jesus close upon that holy night. 
-Children's Songbook #38

Thursday, November 3, 2011

MMM Halloween 2011



May Jones as The Invisible Woman (Hiding from her Four Kids?)

Scott Heffernan & Aimee's Monkey ... Scott Hales' Buffy & Vampires 

Pete Codella, Kids & Tank (Weimaraner) ... Ken Craig & Family (They Have 7 Dwarfs)

Seattle Jon as Jimenez the Jeweler & Kids (SF Giant, Jedi & Old Maid)

MAB's Kids Continuing the Tradition Internationally

Monday, September 26, 2011

The Diaper Dilemma



by Aimee (bio)

image via Bum Genius

When we were expecting our first child, I talked to many cloth diapering parents about their decision to do cloth instead of disposable diapers. After hearing how much easier the process was than I had previously assumed, I was sold. Sign me up! I had my colors picked out for our future tree hugger and was dreaming about what we would do with all the money we would save. New couches?! But wait....convincing my husband was an unforeseen challenge.

I thought the argument for cost would win him over, but he wasn't easily persuaded. We then moved into an apartment building with a shared, coin-operated laundry and my dreams for cloth diapering were thrown out with the bathwater.

We are currently pregnant with baby #2 and plan to soon move into a house with our own personal, non-coin-operated washer and dryer. My desire for cloth diapering has been renewed! But alas, I face the same problem with my husband as I did before. Click here please.

I would love to hear from any mom, or more importantly dad, who might have opinions on this most important poop issue. Successes, failures, tips, warnings? Is it as easy as cloth diapering families describe it to be? Or does cloth diapering really just stink? (pun intended) 

Your input is appreciated!

Sunday, September 11, 2011

9-11 Remembrances



by Seattle Jon (bio)


What do you remember? Leave a comment ...

Seattle Jon
I was an investment banker in Baltimore on 9-11. I was at my desk when the first and second planes hit the towers. I remember the guy who sat across from me (he was also LDS) turning around and saying, "Hey, there are planes hitting buildings in New York." When the third plane hit the Pentagon, he turned around again and said, "Dude ... I think this is the end of the world." His statement sent chills through me. Soon after, we went down to the trading floor where we watched both towers fall on fifty television screens. It was horrifying to think what our headquartered colleagues across the street from the towers were going through. Baltimore essentially shut down, and I was only able to get out of the city because I knew a few cabbies. I spent the next few days glued to the news, worrying about my wife and daughter in Utah.

Scott Heffernan
I was on a mission in Bristol, England on 9/11. We happened to be tracting door-to-door when the attacks began. We knocked on a woman’s door, introduced ourselves as missionaries, and she curtly told us she was not interested. As we were walking away she said, “Wait…Have you seen what’s going on?...I think you better come in.” We watched her TV in shock and confusion as the first tower burned, a plane crashed into the second tower, and then both towers collapsed. It was a heavy, heavy day and the mission changed a great deal after that.

Kyle August
I was a freshman in high school and had just started attending early morning seminary. We were reading something as a class when "the late kid" came in, interrupted us, and said, "I was watching the craziest movie! Planes were hitting buildings. It was nuts." We didn't pay him any attention and returned to our reading. After seminary, I hitched my usual ride and entered my high school. Normally you could hear a loud buzz of socializing going on, but when I opened the door it was silent. I remember thinking that school must have been canceled, but then I heard a news voice. As I moved toward it, I saw hundreds of students gathered around every TV in the school. Everyone was watching and not saying a word to each other. I spotted a friend and asked him what was going on. He didn't say anything. He just pointed to the TV. TVs stayed on in every classroom all day. We really didn't get much done.

Pete Codella
9-11 happened the day after my wife and I brought our first child home from the hospital and on my wife’s birthday. We lived in Henderson, Nevada at the time and had just struggled through a sleepless night when my sister-in-law phoned to ask if we had seen the news, and no, we didn’t have the TV on at 6:50 in the morning! Amid the realization that our lives had forever changed now that we were parents, we were forced to deal with the fact that terrorists had figured out how to launch a pretty successful attack on U.S. soil. It was a new world. I lived and worked in Manhattan from 1996-97 and went through the Trade Center on my way to work at the World Financial Center every workday. Plus my wife’s sister (a different sister-in-law than the one who called) was studying at NYU at the time, so we were all concerned as to her whereabouts. She was impacted like all New Yorkers but not in danger of harm. It was surreal to realize that a place I had frequented almost daily for two years, and could have been in on that fateful day, was now destroyed. We celebrate 9-11 in our family because it's the day my sweetheart was born, long before terrorists destroyed the World Trade Towers.

Dustin
I had recently returned from my mission and was attending BYU-Idaho. I stumbled out of bed a bit late that morning to find my roommates glued to the TV. As I poured a bowl of cereal, they told me that one of the twin towers was in flames and that an airplane had apparently hit the building. I was shocked, but didn't grasp the gravity of the situation until the second tower was hit. "This can't be a coincidence, right?" I asked. I'll never forget how I felt when I found out the source of the attacks...dismayed, angry, vengeful, and, in spite of being in one of the most remote locations in the U.S., unsafe.

MAB
In 2001 I was living in the San Francisco Bay Area, and was asleep when the first plane hit the World Trade Center on 9-11. My alarm clock was set to a local news station and it was typical for me to wake up, listen to the radio for a minute and then hit the snooze bar a few times. That morning was no different. Each time the alarm went off there were anxious voices, and I eventually understood through a sleepy daze that one or two planes had hit the WTC in New York and it seemed serious. At that time we didn't have a television, so not knowing what else to do, I got ready for the day and headed in to work. Like everyone there, I was glued to my computer trying to understand what was happening. I wasn't getting much work done since the magnitude of what happened made my routine activities seem trivial. By noontime there was so much information and speculation flooding in via the internet that our CEO sent an email and told everyone they could go home to be with their families.

Max Power
I can't say anything overly interesting about where I was the morning of September 11, 2001. I awoke that morning to the phone ringing--a friend calling to tell me to turn on the news. At that point, only United 11 had hit the north tower, and everything still appeared to be some confusing, inexplicable accident. I distinctly recall the startling wave of realization that crashed over me as I watched, live, the second plane, United 175, make an unnaturally sharp turn and slam into the south tower. It was remarkably clear to me at that point that something was terribly wrong. My recollection of that surreal scene, as well as the disbelief I felt as the first tower fell, will probably never leave me. For me, 9/11 serves as one of a handful of moments of uncomfortable revelation in my life, where something I once treasured is irrecoverably gone. Like discovering that your parents are semi-annually defrauding you every Christmas and Easter. Or like the jerk who put razor blades in candy bars one halloween and ruined the event for everyone, forever, because the thrill of amassing an obscene hoard of candy is somehow spoiled by parents sorting through your stash and discarding anything that isn't hermetically packaged. I hate the fact that I really want to watch the 9/11 Tribute in Lights from the Brooklyn Bridge this year, but I am too afraid to be around major New York landmarks. And I miss the feeling of invulnerability we used to have, a uniquely American sort of naivete that war and civilian life can be neatly separated, with war cordoned off on a foreign battlefield thousands of miles away and insulated by oceans and the innocence of never before being attacked on our turf. That all went away when we watched planes flying into buildings.

Aimee
I was three weeks away from entering the MTC to leave on my mission to Sendai, Japan. I had wrapped things up at my job and was taking it easy until I left in early October. I was still asleep when my brother-in-law Tyler who was living with us at the time, came into my room to tell me I needed to come watch the news. I could not believe what I was witnessing on that tv screen. What had happened to the world while I was peacefully sleeping? Both towers had fallen and the news was recapping the events and filming the awful aftermath. With a heavy heart for the victims, their families, and our world, I sat in my pajamas on the living room floor watching the coverage the rest of the day.

Friday, August 5, 2011

The Birds & The Bees (& Babies)



by Aimee (bio)


As a marriage and family therapist (and someone who just enjoys chatting about the subject), I hear a lot of couples discuss their struggles with getting back into the intimacy groove once the baby(ies) joins the family. As a new mom, an article titled Sex and The Baby Years really helped me get my head back in the game a few weeks after having our baby boy.

The CNN Health author, Ian Kerner, takes a fun, realistic approach on the issue of sexuality for couples after babies. One of my favorite lines from the article reads:
We believe that sex matters. It’s the glue that binds couples together. It’s what makes us more than just friends. Without sex, lovers become roommates, and a bedroom becomes just a place to sleep in (often with a kid or two in it as well).
Amen. Sex matters! A lot. And as committed couples, working hard to make sex an enjoyable, safe and pleasant experience can make all the difference in our overall health.

Also note the great advice for dads (hint: Don't Give Up!) and the direct, healthy advice for moms in point number four.

Image via CNN Health

Thursday, May 12, 2011

This Is Not A Post About Swinging



by Aimee (bio)

source
Before I got married, I didn’t realize how complicated finding married friends would be as a couple.

The ladies need to like each other.
The men need to like each other.
I need to like the guy of the couple.
My husband needs to like the girl.
And the same goes for them.
They both need to like both of us back.
The same rules apply for our same-sex couple friends too. 

Once married, you think you have been released from the dating world, but little do you know that you have merely graduated into a whole new world of dating.

Couple Dating.
(And you thought dating alone was hard?)

Finding successful couple friends is an art form. Everyone needs to genuinely like each other in order for it to be a successful couple friendship that will last a lifetime…the kind of friendship where you get choked up at their children's weddings.

"How did the kids grow up so fast?" {tear}

This may seem like it would be easy to find, but in the real world, couple dating is a complicated, delicate, relational, and highly important marital matter.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Other MMM Posts

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