How, When and Why Do You Give?

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by Seattle Jon:

The New York Times ran an op-ed recently outlining Alicia Keys' plans to "gather an army" from her fans in support of 12 groups that further social justice causes.

Here are the groups: All Out, a gay rights organization; CARE, the aid group; Equal Justice Initiative, which combats racial inequity in the criminal justice system; the Future Project, which empowers high school students in America; Girl Rising, which supports girls' education around the world; Keep a Child Alive, which helps children affected by H.I.V. and AIDS; Moms Rising, which supports universal prekindergarten, maternal leaves and tighter gun laws; Oxfam, which fights global poverty; Partners in Health, which tackles disease worldwide; the Trevor Project, which prevents suicide among gay and lesbian youths; the Trayvon Martin Foundation, which fights racial profiling; and War Child, which supports children in conflict areas.

To get the effort started, Keys donated $1 million of her own money, released a new song related to the effort and has said she will do more to address racism, injustice and poverty in future songs.

I applaud Ms. Keys' - she is one of the world's best-known singers, and with 35 million fans on Facebook and almost 20 million followers on Twitter (MMM is close behind with 1600+ followers), I'm sure her efforts will yield impressive results and I admire how she directs her time and money to causes she believes in. Naturally, this got me thinking about where my own time and money goes.

Duty and Passion Can Co-Exist

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by Dustin:

In 2006 while attending grad school I stumbled upon an interesting phenomenon gripping the Elder's Quorum of the Ward: a belief that duty and passion can't co-exist in career.

A year earlier I had quit my job in public relations to figure out my passion and follow it. My wife, one-year-old daughter, and I packed up a moving truck and set out into the great unknown. We carried no debt which made the leap easier and we had calculated the bare minimum we could live off of to sustain us while I explored career paths. It was shockingly little.

I landed in a degree program that was aligned with my passion -- educational leadership -- and was knee deep in it in 2006 when we invited a family from the Ward over for dinner. He was in law school and I asked him to tell me about the day when he woke up and said, "I'm going to be a lawyer." His wife was deep in conversation with my wife and he hushed his voice and leaned in to answer my question.

"I don't actually want to be a lawyer."

Whoa. What?! Then why in the world ...

"I just didn't know what else to do when I graduated and it seemed like a viable option."

So why don't you do something else?

"I can't. I'm in deep. I figure I've just got to buckle down and earn a living. Support the fam."

Why can't you do both? Do something else and still earn a living?

"Too much unknown. It's probably not feasible anyway. Better to just do this for a decade or two and then do what I really want."

A decade. Or two. That's a long time.

Over the next year as we invited others over I heard the same story over and over again. Guy doesn't know what to do when he graduates. Driven by a sense of duty, he enrolls in a degree program to take his place in society working a job he lacks passion for but with the hope that one day he can quit and do what he really wants.

This post has a high risk of sounding judgy, so let me pause and simply state my belief. You can do both. You can both pursue your passion and bring home the bacon. They aren't mutually exclusive. In fact, we need you to do it. The world needs it. Positive change is made when people pursue passion with purpose.

There's nothing wrong with being duty-driven. That's not my angle. And if passion isn't important and duty is, that's okay too. But if you want to pursue passion AND you feel a sense of duty to provide for your family, this post is for you. It's possible, and as with anything unconventional it takes effort, intentional work, and focus. It may take some sacrifices -- the kind that the whole family has to be behind -- and you may not succeed right away. But it can happen.

I can't tell you how to do it in a 300-word post. There's simply too much to cover. But if you need some guidance start here and here. You may also want to read Seth Godin, Steven Pressfield, and Chris Guillenbeau to name a few. I also write about the topic on my blog and, in the spirit of pursuing passion and purpose, am aiming to publish a book in October to help clarify the process.

The blessing of agency is that we get to choose what we do. We choose our work. I love this advice from President Eyring's father: "You ought to find something that you love so much that when you don't have to think about anything, that's what you think about." It's never too late to choose your work.


Dustin currently lives in Houston, Texas with his wife and four children. After serving a mission in Puerto Rico, he set the tone for a happy marriage by failing Dating and Marriage Prep at BYU-Idaho. He then showed why this happened, dragging his family around the nation with nine moves in seven years, all in the name of figuring out what to do with his life. He found his way into leadership development and now works at YES Prep Public Schools training teachers to be leaders and as a private consultant for businesses and non-profits. He especially enjoys helping people figure out their best-fit career and get into it and spits serious game on the topic at www.dustinpeterson.me. He loves bacon, Dallas sports teams, and long walks on the beach. Email him at dustin (at) dustinpeterson (dot) me. Twitter: @dustin_lead.
Image credit: Czarina Cleopatra Mendoza (used with permission).

MMM Library: Is Tithing the Same as Giving to Charity?

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by Kyle:

On [the August 15, 2012] episode of NBC’s Rock Center with Brian Williams, reporter Natalie Morales interviewed Ann Romney, wife of Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney. You can see the interview here.

During the course of the interview the questions turned to the campaign, and to their refusal to release additional tax returns to the public. At the conclusion of her reasons for not releasing additional tax returns, she said that they pay their taxes, and added “beyond paying our taxes we give ten percent of our income to charity.” I know the Romney’s have given a great amount to various charitable organizations outside of the LDS community, but this sparked in my mind a debate: is paying tithing the same as donating money to charity?

Brother Jake Explains: Tithing

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by Brother Jake:



Brother Jake is the caboose of a big Mormon family. He enjoys playing video games and making silly videos. After serving a mission in Peru, he married a violinist, transferred schools, and finished his undergrad at Indiana University. He is currently pursuing a Master's degree in analytics (a dumb word for "statistics") at NC State. He has extremely stretchy elbow skin.

A Primer on Craigslist Housing Scams

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by LJ:

Between late January and mid-February, our landlord passed away unexpectedly and my husband was let go from his job. One heaven-sent job offer and a month later, we found ourselves back in Arizona with a working car and a (mostly) happy family, but nowhere permanent to live.

We jumped headfirst into the gaping maw of Craigslist and this is where I started to see some patterns in its sad, scammy world, especially the rental listings. I share this hard-earned knowledge with you in the hopes it saves you a few hours of empty searches. Let's start with my favorite rental scam, the Sloppy Listing. 

The Sloppy Listing has three trademarks: (1) a single, grainy photo of the house exterior, (2) wobbly English, and (3) the zip code awkwardly written anywhere in the description.

Example:

Home Sweet Home For You !

Description: You don't want to get pass by this beautiful home in the charming 85254 zip code area neighborhood of Phoenix. This house is fine 3/4 acre parcel with 4 bedroom 2 and half bath with granite counters in the bathroom and kitchen area's. It is beautiful home and come by and see today before its going to someone else!

A bonus giveaway to a Sloppy Listing is that the monthly rent is way too low, or any additional photos are obviously pieced together from two different houses. My favorite was a home in "central Phoenix" with all deciduous trees in the front yard and a snow-capped mountain range in the background.

If you pass the Sloppy Listing, you might get lured in by the Sorta Legit Listing. It has (mostly) correct English and pertinent property information, but the photographer has carefully cropped out the cat skeletons in the rafters or the bombed-out meth shack next door. This is where I turn to Google Maps to show me street views of the neighborhood and then SHABAMMO. I can see for myself the scrap lumber pile off the carport that houses a giant scorpion colony.

Use Bill Pay to Pay Tithing

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by Seattle Jon:

Turns out, you can pay your tithing using bill pay. Tell me this isn't the best thing you've read all day. Especially since being able to pay tithing via bill pay is one of the prophetic signs of the times mentioned in Revelations (at least according to some interpretations).

I recently used the service to pay our annual tithe to the church. For years we'd been mailing a year-end check - believe me, this is much better and the tax reporting happens automatically (I've had to make a reminder call for my tax statement the last few years). Here are the steps I went through to get set up.

Step 1 - Email LDS Donations (donations@ldschurch.org, 801-240-2554)

Ask for the bill pay setup information. They'll send you the below, which you'll fill out and return via email. Note - bill pay only works with U.S. funds from U.S. banking institutions.

Step 2 - Set Up Payees

Ideas for Periods of Academic Transition

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by Seattle Jon:

Our children re-entered the public school system (7th, 6th, 3rd and 2nd grades) this year after five years of being part-time homeschooled. I'll be honest, there were tears shed when the decision was made (mostly from the kids). I think they truly enjoyed the way they were schooled and realized how much they would miss their interactions with friends and teachers at the resource center they attended. But we sensed some anticipation as well, as if new adventures were around the corner.

As parents, our two biggest transitional concerns - especially for our seventh-grade daughter, were social and academic. We thought long and hard about what we could do to help the transition go more smoothly. Here are a few ideas we implemented.

(1) Homework Table - Our three elementary-aged boys have minimal homework, so they are required to start their homework at our kitchen table as soon as they get home. My wife tries to make the table as inviting as possible, with snacks and supplies waiting for them. Unless there is a conflict on the calendar, none of our boys leave the table until their homework is done.

(2) Game Nights - This idea is patterned after my own experiences as a teenager. My dad was around and usually involved with the young men's program, either as a bishop or a leader, so it seemed like there were always kids hanging out at our house. We suggested to our two oldest the idea of a semi-regular game night with their friends and they ran with it. We asked them to call each friend - no texts or emails until after the invitation was extended - and helped them plan fun games and food. One idea put forth by our 13 year-old and implemented during Game Night II was a "phone bin" for all the mobile phones. Forced socializing is still socializing, right? The house can get a little crazy cozy with 12 teenagers playing Reverse Charades, Pit, Spoons and Scum, but the social lessons are worth the craziness coziness.

There's Gold In Them There Hills

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by Kyle (bio)

I've recently been on this kick of watching these gold digging shows. Mainly Gold Rush from Discovery Channel. The show is about this father/son team that gets together with their down-on-their-luck friends and decide that digging for gold in Alaska will solve all their financial woes.

Side note: A lot of the guys in the show have epic beards that are very inspiring for MMM's Beardliness is Next to Godliness challenge. (going on now, you can still enter)

When talking about this show with others, I've come across a story about a gold mine right here in Utah: The Lost Rhoades Mine. Ever wonder where the gold for the Angel Moroni statue came from? Well me neither, but you're about to find out. It's a tale of drugs, money, secrets, visions and murder! Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuun.

The story goes (according to Kerry Ross Boren and Lisa Lee Boren, authors of The Gold of Carre-Shinob) that the Aztecs took a large stash of their gold north through Mexico to save it from being captured by Cortez, because it turns out Cortez wasn't so much a white-bearded god as he was a giant a-hole. They hid it in a place where they believed their ancestors came from: you guessed it, the Uintah mountains in good ol' Utah. The Ute Indians kept it safe and hidden--that is, until the Mormons showed up. After a smoke or two on the peace pipe (this is the drugs part) with Brigham Young, the Ute chief decided he wanted to show the gold to one Mormon, Isaac Morley. The chief later told Bro. Morley that he once saw Morley in a vision and his gods had told him that Morley would be the one to be shown the sacred gold mine.

Bro. Morley convinced the chief to let him take the gold to Brigham Young. BY promised the chief he would use it for sacred purposes including the decoration of the temple and a statue for the top, like a big golden cake-topper. BY wanted to keep the gold under wraps (for obvi reasons) and, with the chief, decided that only Bro. Morley would know where the mine was located. When Bro. Morley became too old, the calling of a lifetime fell to the eponymous Thomas Rhoades (why can't I get a calling like this?).

Is Mormonism an Affinity Scam?

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by Shawn Tucker (bio)

An affinity scam is a fraud where the victims are taken in because they share something in common. This affinity or commonality makes them more trusting, less critical of claims, and then more willing to give fraudsters both the benefit of the doubt and a possible "in house" solution to the problem. Once fraudsters gain trust, then the scam spreads very quickly through the group. The recent Madoff fraud is a recent and spectacular example of an affinity scam. Oh, and according to a report in the Economist, Utah is the affinity fraud capital of the United States.

It is easy to see how Mormons might be taken in by fraudsters. We are welcoming to newcomers and inherently trusting of those in the flock. And we are slow, very slow apparently, to see wolves in sheep's clothing. This has raised a very troubling question for me: is Mormonism an affinity scam? Are Mormons, for the most part, lulled into believing the church's claims for the same reasons that so many Mormon are taken in by fraudsters?

There seem to be good reasons to conclude that yes, Mormonism is an affinity scam. Children are carefully trained to understand and then repeat key doctrinal principles. They are very powerfully rewarded for adherence, and just as powerfully de-incentivized to deviate. Young people are encouraged to socialize and marry within the community. There is also a strong cultural norm toward marrying earlier than non-Mormons. Those young married couples seem to have children sooner and find their place strongly cemented into Mormon church congregations. As an Institution, the church does not seem particularly forthright about the unpleasant or at least human elements of its history, including its racism, sexism, and mistreatment of gays. Polygamy also seems to be frequently glossed over. A reading of Rough Stone Rolling gives one the sense that South Park's version of how Joseph translated the Book of Mormon is much closer to historical fact than what one might believe from church illustrations of that process. All of this lends credence to the idea that not only are Mormons easy victims of financial scams, but they may also be easily hoodwinked by other forms of intellectual, emotional, or spiritual duplicity.

I think the worst thing that Mormons can do is to just pretend that the above three paragraphs do not exist. Remember, affinity scams are effective because people of a group are too trusting and less critical. The best way, it seems to me, to avoid an affinity scam is to act as if one is not part of the group and try to develop an outsider's critical eye. Two things might be helpful in develop an outsider's critical eye: always having the faith to ask the hardest questions and missionary work.

Handbook of Instructions (1940): Tithes

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by Seattle Jon (bio)

My youngest brother recently gifted me a Handbook of Instructions from 1940 signed by first presidency members Heber J. Grant, J. Reuben Clark, Jr. and David O. McKay. At 170 pages, the handbook is much shorter then our current versions (Handbook 1 alone is 186 pages) yet contains some interesting rulings and regulations - and language - which I'll share over time on MMM.

Persons Exempt from Payment of Tithing

Aged persons without incomes; women who have no income separate from that of their husbands; children who have no individual source of revenue; and persons dependent entirely upon federal or other relief are exempt from the payment of tithes. Those receiving federal or other relief may be considered exempt because the relief rendered is supposedly only sufficient to supply their absolute needs. All Latter-day Saints should be encouraged to cultivate the spirit and practice of tithepaying when conditions are such that they are able to earn.

Fast Offerings

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by Eliana (bio)

I know the purpose of fast offerings: President Gordon B. Hinckley has said that if the principles of fast day and the fast offering were observed throughout the world, "the hungry would be fed, the naked clothed, the homeless sheltered. Our burden of taxes would be lightened. The giver would not suffer but would be blessed by [this] small abstinence. A new measure of concern and unselfishness would grow in the hearts of people everywhere. Can anyone doubt the divine wisdom that created this program which has blessed the people of this church as well as many who are not members of this church?" (1991)

I know the stated expectation of amount: "An important reason for fasting is to contribute the amount saved from the meals not eaten to care for the poor and the needy." L. Tom Perry, 1986

I even know the optional super-sized version: "Sometimes we have been a bit penurious, and figured that we had for breakfast one egg and that cost so many cents and then we give that to the Lord. I think that when we are affluent, as many of us are, … we ought to be very, very generous … and give, instead of the amount we saved by our two meals of fasting, perhaps much, much more—ten times more where we are in a position to do it." Spencer W. Kimball, 1974

At my house, no one fasts. Another subject for another day. The cost of food is something like $10 for a day of meals for our family. If you take out dinner, let's say like $5. That seems like a silly fast offering, even if multiplied by every single person in my ward.

Of all things done with my financial contributions, I feel most strongly about fast offerings. It seems like the purest of Christ-like charity. It shouldn't matter what others are contributing, but I do wonder. People are weird talking about money, so I'm wary of bringing it up.

If you aren't comfortable sharing a specific dollar amount that you give as fast offerings, how about a percentage? I give 1%. That is neither right nor wrong, just where it is for now. I'm thinking about it a lot though and would love to hear your thoughts.

8 Reasons Why I Want My Kids to Attend the BYU

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by Eliana (bio)

I swore I wouldn't go there. For 16 years I only knew one thing about post-secondary education—that I would not be attending BYU. Then it came time to actually pay for college, and suddenly the cloud parted and I did some math. And spent the next four years in Provo, Utah.

8. You can be slightly rebellious and feel like you are wild. Case in point: my collection of letters to the editor from The Daily Universe from concerned students about my shaved head.

7. Serious scripture study. I attended four years of early morning seminary. It was good but not rigorous. Rather, two years were good. Two were ridiculous. I've never had an experience with institute, so I only speak of what I know. One of the best parts of BYU for me was having to focus on thinking about the scriptures as homework.

6. Price. It just can't be beat. Really.

5. My parents met in a family home evening group. They both went off on missions and eventually came back and got hitched in the Provo Temple. My husband and I met at BYU also. There's some family history involved. I'm not super into history, but as I grow older I'm getting more nostalgic. I'd like to drop my kids off at college and force them to relive moments with me.

4. Sleeping with your date isn't expected. I'm not saying it doesn't happen or that all college students aren't thinking about sex anyway. It is just slightly easier to make good choices on the big stuff if those around you are making the same efforts.

3. Devotionals and forums. This happens at other universities, obviously, but I got to listen to amazing people speak while I was at BYU. Prophet and apostles yes, but also fascinating movers and shakers like Margaret Thatcher, Myrlie Evers Williams, Muhammad Yunus, for example. I love that the BYU campus shuts down for an hour a week for these happenings.

2. Did I mention the cost? I'm a professor at a community college these days and I have constant stress about higher education costs even though I have no desire to foot the bill for my kids.

1. Ridiculous rules. Overly zealous everything. Difficult access to Diet Coke. BYU was challenging for me. It is hard to know what to attribute to college generally and BYU specifically, but I am confident saying that going there was my right choice. It has taken me years to be able to admit that, but there you have it.

MMM readers, what do you think? Would you recommend your kids head to Happy Valley?

The BeFrugal Browser Add-On

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by Pete Codella (bio)

Although this post is secular in nature, it is very much geared to provident living. For full disclosure, the tool this article is focused on was developed by a client of mine, but it's so cool that I had to share. And I'm not even a very frequent online shopper.

If you do any shopping online, you seriously should check-out this browser add-on that automatically identifies any coupons or discount codes, then lets you select the one you want from a drop-down when you checkout. The tool is available now and works in Internet Explorer, Firefox and Chrome.

It's called the BeFrugal Add-On. The tool crowdsources coupons, so if someone uses a code on a site that isn't already in the system, once it's accepted by the merchant, the code is added to the online database for that site, benefiting all Add-On users.

If you ever do any shopping online and find yourself going from site to site looking for coupons and discount codes, the BeFrugal Add-On is bound to save you tons of time and money. It automates the whole online discount shopping process, which, I suppose, is why it's called Couponomatic™.

I think the add-on is the digital version of what some families do around the kitchen table each week, clipping coupons and filing them for later in-store use. That was then, the BeFrugal Add-on is now — a discount shopping tool for the digital age.

Also, BeFrugal has a cash back program that works at more than 3,000 sites covering 80% of the top 500 online retailers. So in addition to discount and coupon codes, shoppers can receive cash back through BeFrugal, requesting a PayPal deposit or check in the mail once their account reaches $25.

As I said, I'm not a big online shopper, but I'm really impressed with this tool. I think it will be a game changer for Internet shopping. I'm going to use it this holiday season. Give it a try and let me know what you think.

The Worth of a Soul is $752.3 Million

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by Ben Johnson (bio)

In the book Starship Troopers an interesting conversation takes place between a soldier and a professor at the military academy. They debate a hypothetical situation where, after a protracted and vicious war between two countries, prisoners are being kept by one side. The question posed to the soldier is "are a thousand unreleased prisoners sufficient reason to start or resume a war?" Without hesitating he answers in the affirmative. The professor then says "Very well, is one prisoner, unreleased by the enemy, enough reason to start or resume a war?" This time the soldier isn't so quick with his response. After much thought the soldier comes to the conclusion that the worth of just one man is sufficient reason.

What if the conversation was about souls instead of men and we were talking money and not war? What do you suppose one soul would be worth? Let's think about this in terms of something we can relate to. How much money do you think the church spends each year on missionary work? I’m talking about keeping the lights on at the MTCs, printing copies of the Book of Mormon, running the I’m A Mormon campaign, pass along cards, other radio and TV advertising, etc. Add that all up and you are looking at a check with a lot of zeros on it.

Someone cleverer than I could suss out a fairly accurate dollar amount and then divide into that the number of convert baptisms each year. That would give you how much we spend for each baptism. Do you think there is some sort of 'return on investment' that the church has to have in order to continue to spend the money on missionary work that they do? Would the church spend that amount of money if they knew they would only baptize 10,000 people? 500? One?

Guest Post: Is Tithing the Same as Giving to Charity?

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Have something to say? Anyone can submit a guest post to Modern Mormon Men. Send us an email with your post, a post title and a paragraph of introduction (on yourself).

Kyle Jarrett lives and works in Washington DC with his wife and two kids - Xbox controller #1 and Xbox controller #2. He graduated from the University of Utah and is currently a grad student at American University. His day job is in Democratic politics, please save your groans for later. In his spare time he enjoys hanging out with his two kids, playing golf with his wife, and eating copious amounts of Cheetos.

On last Thursday’s episode of NBC’s Rock Center with Brian Williams, reporter Natalie Morales interviewed Ann Romney, wife of Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney. You can see the interview here.

During the course of the interview the questions turned to the campaign, and to their refusal to release additional tax returns to the public. At the conclusion of her reasons for not releasing additional tax returns, she said that they pay their taxes, and added “beyond paying our taxes we give ten percent of our income to charity.” I know the Romney’s have given a great amount to various charitable organizations outside of the LDS community, but this sparked in my mind a debate: is paying tithing the same as donating money to charity?

To me, no, not even close.

Is tithing tax deductible as a charitable donation? Yes, but I would argue that, in general, tithe payers are not writing their tithing checks as a charitable gift (I pay mine online, are checks still a thing?). The Law of Tithing is a religious commandment of obedience and sacrifice. It is in place to not only show the faithfulness of the members, but also as one of the main monetary resources the church has to help build the Kingdom of God.

Former president of the church, Gordon B. Hinckley, said “Our major source of revenue is the ancient law of the tithe. Our people are expected to pay 10 percent of their income to move forward the work of the Church.” (emphasis added) (source: Mormon.org)

It is the expectation that fully active members pay ten percent of their income to the church that excludes it from being actual charity. Members of the church are required to be full tithe payers in order to participate in temple ceremonies and to hold specific callings in the church.

On the other hand, paying a fast offering is specifically designed as a charitable contribution to help those who are in need. But tithing and fast offerings are completely separate in both the motivation in giving, and its use.

In my personal experience, the act of paying tithing is not done with the mindset that I am being charitable; rather it is done with the mindset of being obedient. But when I am paying a fast offering, I am in the mindset of knowing this money will help someone else. Thinking of tithing as a charitable contribution actually diminishes the motivation behind writing the check, and demeans the intent of the law.

On a side note, Rock Center with Brian Williams will be airing a segment tonight titled “Mormon in America” so stay tuned for that.

The Golden Nickel: How to Get Your Kids to Do What You Want

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by Dustin (bio)

There's this quote in leadership literature that says that the essence of leadership is getting others to do what you want because they want to. Now this sounds awfully manipulative but when you apply it to parenting it's just downright genius. Three weeks ago my wife and I stumbled on a little parenting "pot of gold" that has influenced our kids to do what we ask them to because they want to. I'm sharing it with MMM readers and ONLY MMM readers as a benefit to you for your faithfulness in following the blog and occasionally commenting. I'm even throwing a bone to those who like to blast various posts with weird and often overly critical commentary. You're welcome.

But first, imagine this: You roll over at 6:30 a.m. and throw a crusty-eyed glance out into the living room. From your vantage point in bed you can see the last few stairs of the stairwell and, to your surprise, you see your six year-old and four year-old -- fully dressed in their clothes for the day -- tip-toeing down the stairs with their laundry baskets and having already made their beds. At first you think you've gone insane. Then you go through major holidays in your mind. Father's Day? Nope. Mother's Day? Nope. What could have possibly convinced your otherwise individualistic and disobedient children to manage themselves in a mature, almost adult-like way? And then you remember ... the nickels.

Asking For An Arm And A Leg

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by Sam Nelson (bio)

If any of you have been around a newly returned missionary, you’ll notice two things.

1) They won’t stop talking about their mission.
2) They will bring up the same few people over and over.

Luciano was that for me. I baptized Luciano Concha when he was a young teenager in my first area. Despite few friends in the church and being the only member of his family, he attended church every Sunday. He loved it, he had a difficult life and found comfort and hope in the gospel. The gospel was the perfect outlet for his highly intelligent and curious self; after only one year Luciano had read the entire Book of Mormon twice, the New Testament once, and was halfway through the D&C. When I returned to visit him later on my mission, I realized I could talk to him about Book of Mormon stories and church doctrine as if he were an adult.

You meet thousands of people on the mission, and between those thousands of people there are a few that are simply extraordinary. A few people you feel like, alone, would have made your entire mission worth it. You know that in the future, they will be leaders in the church, and their children will have the opportunity to grow up in a gospel-centered home. It’s a rush just thinking about the potential impact on future generations. There was no one more like that for me than Luciano Concha.

Three months ago I received a barrage of emails and Facebook messages with the tragic news that Luciano was involved in a train accident. Although he miraculously survived, he had the misfortune of losing his entire right arm and leg.

Financial Transparency & The LDS Church

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by Seattle Jon (bio)

As monthly contributors to the Open Stories Foundation (mormon-related podcasts), my wife and I recently received a donor letter for our tax return. The stated purposes of the letter were:

1) To provide an end-of-year donation report,
2) To review what Open Stories was able to accomplish during the year, and
3) To let donors know some of what was ahead.

The summary of the foundation’s accomplishments and preview of what was ahead were nice, but what really caught my eye was the report on the foundation’s finances, including a profit and loss statement and a balance sheet. I have to say, the financial transparency was refreshing.

For years, I've been sending tithing directly to The Corporation of the President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (the corporation that receives and manages money and church donations) and declining the annual tithing settlement in silent protest of the lack of financial transparency in the church. I’m not trying to start a movement or anything, it’s just that I've spent my entire career in the financial services industry and I think transparency is good business … and good religion.

Guest Post: Sell Out

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Have something to say? Anyone can submit a guest post to Modern Mormon Men. Just send us an email with your post, a post title and a paragraph of introduction (on yourself).

Sam Nelson recently returned from a mission in Chile and is currently studying Economics at BYU. He is part of The 5000 Days Project and is the subject of the film "Two Brothers" released in October 2011. You can read Sam's other guest posts here and here. You can also follow him on twitter: Follow @realSamNelson.

I’ve always been a proponent of doing what you love. After I knew I could put my embarrassing high school academic record behind me and start fresh at BYU I started to dream ... What if I worked at Bain and went to Harvard? I wanted to start my own business someday. I had an uncommon passion for business strategy and a weird knack for microeconomics. I thought about possibly being involved in politics ... I realized I could make a career out of doing what I loved and what I was good at and do it all day every day! Daydreaming about that future was so exciting that it propelled me from being a 3.2 GPA student in high school to a 3.9 GPA student at BYU. I’m not saying that to brag. And it wasn’t because I was just secretly really smart the whole time, it came at a huge cost. Freshman year I had my schedule worked out so I could finish all my classes by noon and study afterward ... There were quite a few days where I would be in the library until it closed at midnight. When you find a life goal that you are excited about ... life changes. I knew I could do well as a dentist like my dad, but I dreamed of more. The birds in the bush were so much more exciting than the bird in the hand!

After a year of college I left for a two-year mission in Chile. In those two years I changed a lot. The mission lets you experience first-hand the ironic joy that comes from forgetting yourself to better the lives of others. Also, if you get sent to Chile, you spend time with the happiest people you’ve ever met and they live in sheet metal houses ... It sounds cliché, but I really “got” that neither money nor prestige buys happiness. In Chile they don’t even really think much about people’s successes or failures. I got let in on a little secret ... Money has nothing to do with happiness. It was the belief that money could affect happiness that made people unhappy (rich or poor). Eureka! It was like when I was in elementary school and I realized that my grades didn’t actually matter!

The Coat

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by Saint Mark (bio)

All I know is that if you're heart is not touched by this video, you don't deserve to have a heart. With no need for words, this story about a boy and his coat encapsulates the meaning of Christmas.



I saw my youngest do something similar this weekend. We went on a Daddy-Son date to Barnes & Noble, read Star Wars Lego books and had a sugar cookie. When we came home, my son hadn't finished his cookie. He went right up to his brother, showed him his cookie and offered the rest to him. I thought he was going to brag about what he got on our date but what he did tugged my heart string and made me proud to be his dad.

What things have your children done lately that have touched you?