In heaven, lift tickets at ski hills will always be 65% off.
In heaven, no one will be grossed out when watching an old person eat corn.
In heaven, every angel will be dressed in Prada.
In heaven, the lion and the lamb shall lay down together. And their parents won't be all, "I told you not to play with that lion down the street. His parents drink, don't you know."
In heaven, whenever you stub your toe, you will either get a new toe or a coupon for a free pair of new shoes!
In heaven, the Deseret Industries will have a cafeteria with gently used food. Shepherd's Pie - yum, yum.
In heaven, the Deseret Industries will smell like Nordstrom instead of a wet dog.
In heaven, sometimes we'll look down at the earth and say, remember that one time we got food poisoning at Arby's and then everyone will laugh and be glad we're in heaven.
In heaven, Motel 6 will be more like the Ritz-Carlton and the Ritz-Carlton will be like the Celestial Kingdom.
In heaven, Joseph Smith will have a meet and greet every Wednesday at 2 p.m.
Sofía Vergara will be in heaven, so, there's that.
6 comments:
Totally my idea of heaven! Except trade out Sofia Vergara for say, Ryan Gosling, and it's like you read my mind or something.
Good to see you back on the blog Bish!
Wet dog! That's what the smell is. I've always wondered. Thanks for clearing that up.
That actually sounds a lot like somewhere I don't want to go. Prada, nordstroms, Ritz Carlton... My heaven,and for that matter my gospel filled earth life are not filled with that much consumerism.
Go listen to the Mormon matters podcast on wealth
@Anonymous Note the comedy label.
In heaven, there will be a separate room with hardback chairs and those bulk cookies made with too much shortening and red dye #5 for all those super righteous souls who can't tell when someone is joking but have the instincts of a bloodhound for other people's wicked ways.
Once that room is filled, I'm putting The Club on the door handles so the rest of us can enjoy our Prada robes and made-up lists in peace.
Amen, DeNae!
I think Heaven will smell like a See's candy store. And a 1 lb. box will count as a free sample.
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