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Sara K.S. Hanks grew up in St. George, Utah and currently lives with her husband and cat near Seattle, where she reads, writes, and prepares to welcome a new baby. Her loves include all-you-can-eat shrimp, Pink Lady apples, the words of Chieko Okazaki and Carol Lynn Pearson, and well-made leather boots.
In October, when President Monson announced the age change for proselyting missionaries, the ripples were immediate. There were texts to bishops and family members -- "Time to get my papers ready!" Heck, the camera operators even turned to the conference center audience for reaction shots. The news that men could serve at 18 instead of 19, and women at 19 instead of 21, inspired a flurry of excitement.
And with the general fervor came special curiosity for what this would mean to young Mormon women. How many more would serve? How would this impact their education, their lives? How would this change the dynamics of Mormon missions (and, ahem, dating)? My own curiosity wandered to the Mormonism of 20 or 50 years from now, a Mormonism with Relief Societies and Primaries full of women who are returned missionaries. What a difference two years can make -- no longer just the two years that young men are expected to serve, but the two-year backstep from 21 to 19, the hastening of an opportunity.
I didn't serve a mission myself, but I can say with 92% certainty that if this age change had come in 2005, I would have been out there. Now I just watch with anticipation (and a little bit of envy) as young women receive mission calls that will completely change their lives, as they perform work that will challenge them in new ways. Suddenly, the conversations we've long been having about preparing for a full-time mission aren't just directed at the boys with the girls as an honored footnote; this narrowed gap in the age of service requires new thinking and thoughtful speaking about missionary work. This is true churchwide, at the ward/branch level, and especially in our own homes. If you've got a daughter (or a granddaughter, niece, treasured young female friend), the decision of whether or not to become a missionary is on the docket for her in a way it simply wasn't before. Here are some ways to encourage her to become a simply amazing missionary, if she so chooses.
Put missionary service on the table
From the time she's little, acknowledge the possibility of a mission. You'll have conversations about college, dream jobs, parenthood, travel, a variety of life goals; missionary work belongs in those conversations. (How about dressing up as a missionary for Halloween? A little purple cardigan, a dress, sturdy black shoes and a black nametag: adorable.) The pre-teen and teen years will give opportunities for talking more concretely about the idea. Consider helping her start a savings account for her future endeavors, and talk about how that may include a mission. There needn't be any particular pressure to choose this path over another, but acknowledging that it's an available option will allow her to consider her own feelings and desires.
Emphasize personal revelation and self-understanding
A recently-posted article from LDS.org,
Preparing to Serve: Suggestions for Young Women, begins this way: "If a mission is the right thing for you, here are some ways you can continue the preparation you've already begun as a disciple of Christ." That big ol' IF represents the primary distinction between how Mormon missionary work is approached for women as opposed to men. For fellas, the counsel is clear: get thyself on a mission. For ladykind, we generally acknowledge that everyone's path is different, and it's up to each individual woman to figure out if a mission is part of her path. While she can counsel with her parents and religious advisors about the decision, knowing what's right or best is really her responsibility. She'll need to be well-versed in personal prayer, how the Holy Ghost speaks to her, and her own abilities/desires in order to make a choice she's comfortable with. Help her in developing that knowledge.
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