Linger Longer 8

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Linger Longer is a series where we highlight articles that recently caught our attention. Add your own articles or reactions to these articles in the comments.

Bloggernacle (religious)

Consequences (Segullah)
If We're Gonna Do This ... (By Common Consent) *NO HAT TIP TO MMM? C'MON*
Exploring Mormon Thought: Sex (Times and Seasons)
Misogyny in Mourning (Feminist Mormon Housewives)
Anonymity and Comment Wars: Facebook vs. Blogging (Zelophehad's Daughters)
The Perfect Mother's Day Gift (The Exponent)
The Childists vs. the Helicopter Parents (Wheat & Tares)
Youth Media: Things As They Really Are (Beginnings New)
It Is Not True That The Beard Makes A Man Look Like A Bear Or A Monkey (Keepapitchinin)
Scott Hales on Teaching Mormon Literature (A Motley Vision)
Vigil Planned in Wake of Suicide by 17 Year-Old Gay Mormon (Religion Dispatches)
Mormon History Odds and Ends: Spring 2012 (The Juvenile Instructor)
B.H. Roberts and the Mormon Political Left (Faith-Promoting Rumor)

Off-Bloggernacle (non-religious)
The Mormon Way of Business (The Economist)
Can't Help Myself: The Power of Habit (The New York Times)

We're Underestimating the Risk of Human Extinction (The Atlantic)
Your Brain, Your Food, and Obesity (Boing Boing) also The Word of Wisdom, Reimagined (MMM)
The Split Brain: A Tale of Two Halves (Nature)
The War Against Youth (Esquire)
This Is What Your Universe Looks Like! (Starts With A Bang!)
Self-Sculpting Sand (MIT News)
Biases That Cripple Smart Decision-Making (The Emotion Machine)
What Does It Mean to be Human? (Brain Pickings)
New Wisdom From Steve Jobs (Fast Company)
The 25 Best Songs of 2012 (So Far) (Paste Magazine)

Get To Know Your Ward Members: Charlene Parmenter

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by Bishop Higgins (bio)

The name's Charlene. Charlene Parmenter. Just moved into the ward about four months ago into the old Forsgren home. Funny, when I walked through with the realtor, I didn't remember it having this smell. So when I come to church smelling like gerbils, you'll know the reason why.

I'm not married, now, but I used to be. Married twice, actually. My first husband and I opened a store in Santa Barbara back in the 70's called "Classy Gal." We sold women's dresses and custom fitted braziers. My husband left me for my sister and they opened up a shop just down the street called "Sassy Gal," which is good they changed the name, because there wasn't anything classy about the two of them, although my husband did have a mustache. His name was Gordon and I know I shouldn't say anything bad about him, but he had large bumps on the back of his head and I felt like, shallow as it may be, those bumps kept me from truly loving him.

My next husband was a wonderful man. Much shorter than me, but I felt like finding a man to marry that was 5 feet one inch tall was like finding a four leaf clover or a good parking spot at a busy sporting event. He treated me like a lady. Unfortunately, he treated himself like a lady, too, and we parted ways.

Modern Mormon Motivational Posters 4

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by A-Dub (bio)

Giveaway 10: Winner

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Congratulations to the following reader, winner of the church books above. Email us your address by Friday, May 11th to claim the books.

BJ Nelson, May 3rd at 7:53 p.m.

Tone Deaf To The Music Of Faith

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by Pete Codella (bio)

I was particularly struck by remarks shared by Apostle Quentin Cook during last month’s General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Quoting a rabbi, who was speaking to Catholic leaders, he pointed out how secular parts of the world have become.

Chief Rabbi Lord Sacks of England, speaking to Roman Catholic leaders last December at the Pontifical Gregorian University, noted how secular some parts of the world have become. He stated that one culprit is “an aggressive scientific atheism tone deaf to the music of faith.”

To thoughtfully consider what Rabbi Lord Sacks was saying, I recommend reading his text in its entirety (source: Office of the Chief Rabbi). And a side note: I sure think it’s cool that an LDS apostle shared remarks made by a rabbi to Catholic Church leaders. I think people of faith have more in common than they sometimes realize.

Which brings me to the idea of being in tune with the sacred music of faith ...

21 Days to More Happiness

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by Dustin (bio)

I recently watched a TED talk by Shawn Achor (also included at the bottom of this post), one of the highest-rated professors at Harvard University for more than a decade, and it rocked my brains. The focus of the talk was on happiness, of which I'm a fan. In the talk, Achor suggests that our idea of the link between success and happiness is distorted. In fact, it's backwards.

I often tell myself, "as soon as I achieve ________ then I'll be happy," as if happiness is just on the horizon and all I have to do is close the distance between it and me. The problem, according to scientific research on happiness, is that each time we experience success our brain changes the bar for success. In other words, once I achieve a goal, happiness is short-lived as my mind automatically begins to explore what else could be possible. I raise the bar and begin anew, searching for more happiness by being more successful. I read my scriptures five nights a week and the goal becomes to read them seven times a week. I find a job that aligns with my strengths 80% of the time and now I need to find one that aligns 90% or 100%. Run a mile? Now run two. Score high on the GMAT? Could've been higher. If, in my mind, happiness lies just beyond success then I will never get there!

Achor says that if we can raise someone's level of positivity in the present then we increase the likelihood of success. We've got to reverse it. Your brain at positive performs significantly better than your brain at negative, neutral, or stressed. In fact your brain is 31% more productive (this is called the "happiness advantage")! In other words, we've got to flip this equation -- success = happiness -- to this: happiness = success.

So how do you increase your happiness to then yield more success? You've got to rewire your brain. In the talk, Achor suggests several things you can do, all of which are unsurprisingly principles of the Gospel. The one he teaches to businesses he consults with is to do this one simple thing:

Guest Post: The Working Mother

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Have something to say? Anyone can submit a guest post to Modern Mormon Men. Just send us an email with your post, a post title and a paragraph of introduction (on yourself).

Carrie Stroud is practically perfect in every way. But on the rare occasion that she is not, you will still find her reaching into that suitcase, hoping an ornate potted plant will come out. You can find more of her at her blog  All That Is Sweet In Life ... where a little bit of salty is mixed in there, too. You can read Carrie's first guest post here.

For the past three years I have been the sole financial provider for my family. We made the decision for my husband to go back to school for his Master's Degree and now that he has finished he is starting his own business, so I still remain the provider for now. Basically, I support him and our family ... support in every definition of the word.

You see, my husband and I feel that it is OKAY for the Mother to work outside the home. But sometimes, within our Church, it is still viewed as the wrong way to do things.

I cannot lie and say that I am happy about my role all the time and that I don't desire to be home with my children, but I also cannot help but feel grateful that we are able to be in our current situation. The idea that I can take away the stress of him having to go to school and work at the same time is an awesome blessing. And in our case now, my working is giving him the opportunity to begin a business that he might not have otherwise been able to do.

By no means do I want to belittle homes that function with the husband as the sole income provider even in difficult circumstances. In fact, when we married and started our family that we did just that. He worked full-time and went to school full-time so I could be home with our new baby ... but it was extremely stressful and hard on him. So why, if we have the choice, would we want to do that again? Why wouldn't it be okay for me to step up as the wife and handle things financially so that in the end he can provide for us in a better way? Why must we be told the "man of the house" should let his wife stay home regardless of the possible financial strain and stress he would have? Must a man be made to feel that kind of pressure?