Tuesday, May 7, 2019

The Waiting Period to Get Married in The Temple is Over!





by RB Mac



When I heard about the change in the temple sealing policy yesterday, I was a little frustrated.  Don’t get me wrong I was happy about it, it a long overdue change. If you haven’t heard: if you have a family that cant be in the temple for the wedding, you can get married outside the temple first, then get sealed without a waiting period.  In North America, there was a one-year waiting period couples would have the wait if they got marries civilly before they could be sealed.)

But I was a little afraid of telling my wife about it. No one from her family was able to be at our wedding in the Bountiful temple, and that was really hard on us.  We talked about doing it civilly, but to be 100% upfront and honest we did not because of the social pressure and stigma associated with anon temple wedding, that by having a civil ceremony we were somehow admitting that we were unworthy of a temple recommend.  And if we did that, it would be my half of the family that would have a hard time supporting us, rather then my wife’s half of the family.   So we had to choose, which half of the family got to be offended because of where we were going to get married?


Now to my wife’s family’s credit, they were so supportive of our wedding, and I have five sisters in awesome laws! But it was hard on us having to choose which side of the aisle to lean towards…. I’m glad that no one has to feel that pressure and make that decision ever again. This is one “policy” reversal that I wish they would make a revelation, publish it in the D&C, and vote on it in General Conference, as to give it the best chance of not getting changed again!

My fear in telling my wife was that she would go “Great, all that pain was for nothing, the Brethren should have made the change a long time ago.” That’s pretty much what she said, and she is right. This change should have been made a long time ago. And while the verbiage in the letter did not say, “we are sorry for the family heartache this policy caused” it at least acknowledged that this policy will get rid of that heartache. Good for them….I guess.

The family has always been the center of the church. In recent years almost every change in church policy from the two-hour block to the LGBTQ changes is all built around strengthening the family.  I am glad that the temple is now in line with that focus, especially on the day a new family is created. 

Cheers,

RB Mac. 




P.S. All the time I hear members remark about how they should not try to make policy changes in the church. That we should be patient and wait for the brethren to reveal the will of the Lord to us.  Well, two items on that.  1. The church askes for members opinion...sometimes.  2. Pointing out issues to the brethren actually works. Just see the recent temple changes in regards to Women and even this change.  here is a link to a petition that has been going around since 2009.  The lesson…. When making a suggestion be prepared to wait for years to see action on the subject, but make the suggestion anyway.  https://www.mormonmatters.org/temple-wedding-petition/

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