by Scott Heffernan:
It's Thanksgiving! Yay!
It's important to spend quality time with family…
It's also important to remember where you came from.
Thanksgiving is magical!
You get to eat turkey…
And watch football…
And eat turkey…
And see the Thanksgiving Day Parade.
And eat turkey.
Some say that turkeys are our friends and we shouldn't eat them…
But really they're kind of jerks.
Here are some tips for a happy Thanksgiving:
Be extra nice to your family.
Even your weirdo brother.
And your other weirdo brother.
Probably best to avoid political debates.
But you still have to be prepared to do battle.
Sometimes to get the leg, you have to be aggressive…
And come in like a wrecking ball.
Be sure to wear the proper attire.
There is always a way to fit more food.
But be sure to save room for dessert.
And be careful not to overdo it.
Cooking the turkey can be tricky.
Consider watching a tutorial.
Don't overcook it.
If you're not going home this year…
There are… alternative options.
Take some time to ponder all the things you have to be thankful for.
Please, please, please be safe!
And above all, have fun!
Scott Heffernan is an artist, designer, and photographer living in Seattle. He works on the creative team at Archie McPhee, doing all manner of strange things. He grew up a child of the 80s in Salt Lake City and loves skateboarding, toys, and thrifting. He served a mission in England/Wales and has a degree in American Sign Language from the University of Utah. He has one wife and two kids. Twitter: @ScottHeffernan. Tumblr: ScottHeff.tumblr.com.