Thursday, August 15, 2013

How to Get a Girl to Fall in Love With You According to The Bachelorette



by Kyle (bio)

I saw this blog post, Letter to my daughter after watching 'The Bachelor', making the rounds a few weeks ago. A friend sent it to me saying that they could see me writing this to my daughter. And of course, I totally would. But someone else has already done the hard work so I'll just show it to her instead.

If you are unaware of The Bachelor/Bachelorette phenomenon, here's the quick version: A group of guys/girls all get together in a large house to compete to fall in love with a single guy/girl. As the show progresses, the guy/girl searching for love on TV eliminates contestants, whittling down the group until there are only two remaining and they must then choose who they want to marry. Awesome, right?

Now I totally agree with everything that is said in the post about The Bachelor, and there are some seriously wrong messages that this show is teaching to both boys and girls. However, I think there are some valuable lessons that any guy can be learn by watching the show. And believe me when I say this: I watch The Bachelorette so you don't have to.

So, after my extensive "research" into this subject, I give you: How to Get a Girl to Fall in Love With You According to The Bachelorette.

Bro Tip #1: V-necks

These are a must. It is clear from watching the bros on the current season of The Bachelorette, that a v-neck is a necessity to any bro's wardrobe. The best part is, you can never own too many v-necks. And you know how some women can be concerned that they might show up to a party ... err ... an FHE, and hope she isn't wearing the same dress or blouse as another woman? Well, while this may not be as big of a concern for a lot of guys, you DEFINITELY don't have to worry about it when it comes to v-necks.

Bro Tip #2: Emotions. SHOW THEM!

Don't be that tough bro who doesn't show your more sensitive side. Let your emotions flow like that raging river you rafted down at Scout camp. The more you can open up to her and show her your softer side, the better your chances of making it to the Home Town Dates and meeting the parents.

This is Drew. Follow Drew's example.

Also, if you don't feel like showing your emotions of love in the form of wet, salty tears, you can always follow Chris' lead and do it with really awful "poetry." Because when you do, she'll go "awwwwwwww!"


Bro Tip #3: Have a really depressing story from your past

I know what you're thinking. Why would I share a really depressing story from my past? The answer, honestly, is I have no freaking clue. But every one of the bros who made it to the Home Town Dates all shared depressing, even tragic, stories about their past.

For example, there's Drew. You know, crying Drew. His tragic story? An abusive alcoholic father. Other's tragic stories ranged from terrible cheating ex-girlfriends to the loss of family members. All of which, for some reason, when told in a candle-lit setting, seems to really pile on the romance ... I guess.

Bro Tip #4: The right reasons

Last, but not least, it is imperative that you demonstrate to your potential love that you are there for the right reasons. Don't love her for fame, fortune, or the chance to be on a reality TV show. You have to be there for one of life's greatest gifts. Love. If you are there for the wrong reasons, trust me, she will know. And if she doesn't, then one of your fellow bros will totally rat you out, like they did to this guy ...

And if you're still unclear about what it means to be there "for the right reasons," well you're in luck because The Bachelorette went ahead and did this.

Again, you guys. I watch this (and live tweet every Monday night @KJinDC7), so you don't have to.

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