by Scott Heffernan:
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do i have to wear a shirt and tie to mormon church
I would at least wear a shirt.
mormon soaking floating marinating
Whatever you call it, you’re not fooling anyone.
are mormon men good in bed
are murmons good in bed
why dont mormons have nipples
You’re thinking of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
why dont mormons like dogs
You’re thinking of the Amish.
do mormons watch tv?
Only while we’re churning butter.
pros and cons for marrying mormon
Pros: Funeral potatoes, close-knit community, sealed for eternity.
Cons: No coffee, three hour church, sealed for eternity.
mormon explanation for cavemen
mormon men who masturbate
mr. clean mormon
do mormons celebrate fathers day
Heavenly Father’s Day
mormons walk backwards
Only in the temple. (And you’re not supposed to know about that.)
do mormons manscape
You should see my unicorn design.X
boredom is sin
I'm just not sure about that right now.
do mormons spank their wives
What happens in the bedroom is none of your business!
lds can you wear a colored shirt while preparing the sacrament
That’s Telestial Kingdom stuff, man.
mormonism is a fraud
You're a fraud.
t shirt under tank mormon
Our signature look.
mormons one black sock one white sock
It’s code to let others know you’re fasting so they won’t offer you food.
advice to mormon men about picking a wife…ankles
If ankles are important to you, then date women who have ankles.
mind wandering during prayer lds
You’re are not alone, my friend.
what pictures should lds home have
Here are the necessities.
was bob ross lds
No, but I’ll bet you a million dollars someone has been baptized for him.
adam and eve umbilical cord
You might be asking the wrong questions.
why is home teaching in the lds church so hard
Because generally speaking the home teachers don’t want to be there, and the home teachees don’t want you to be there. So no one wants to be there, but you are all doing it out of obligation. And then for some reason I can’t fathom, you stay for a really long time.
mormon inlaws are evil
Well you’re kind of sealed to them for eternity so…
Scott Heffernan is a graphic designer and photographer in Seattle. He works on the creative team at Archie McPhee doing all manner of strange things. He grew up a child of the ‘80s in Salt Lake City, served a mission to England/Wales, and got a degree in American Sign Language from the University of Utah. After marrying his sweetheart, they moved to Seattle and had three beautiful baby boys together. He loves toys, skateboarding, and thrift store shopping and has impeccable Modar. Twitter: @ScottHeffernan. Tumblr: ScottHeff.tumblr.com.