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Tuesday, December 18, 2012

8 Things Every Mormon Man Should Say Before He Dies

by Seattle Jon (bio)

Forbes contributor, Jessica Hagy, recently put out a list of 40 things to say before you die. Thinking about what she wrote inspired me to come up with my own version. So, here are 8 things I think every mormon man should say before he dies. What would you add or subtract, and why?

1 I did commit that foul. Church hoops is just around the corner, at least in Seattle. This season, rather than whine, put your hand up when called for a foul.

2 I don’t know, but I choose to hope and have faith. Let's be honest, some of the things we believe are unknowable, and one might say, highly improbable. It's okay to admit that and be more realistic in how we talk about our faith.

3 Joseph Smith may have had 34 wives, but I'd like just one wife forever. Why any mormon man would say anything different is beyond me.

4 One, two tops, trips to the buffet table is enough. Face it, men, we could all be in better shape. Why is saying no to bacon-wrapped shrimp so hard?!

5 No. There are times when saying no at church is the right thing to do. Like saying no to wearing a tie during the three-hour block.

6 I am well read in mormon literature. MMM pounds its readers to read more mormon literature. Put down the USA Today and read more mormon lit.

7 I am going to watch more football not because it’s the right thing to do, but because it’s the righteous thing to do. There is scriptural basis for this statement.

8 I am going to do difficult, but meaningful, things. Our family has chosen homeschooling and adoption. What are you going to tackle?

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