Tips for Interviewing Youth

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by ldsbishop (bio)

An example of a youth interview from the lds.org image library. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't sit quite so close.

A recent article on Doves and Serpents discussed sexually invasive interviews between Priesthood leaders and minors in the LDS church. The potential for abuse in interview situations has long been a concern of mine and as I've blogged about before, I have been a victim of such an interview myself. I wasn't in what I would class a vulnerable group, just a naive new member, but the potential for abuse was still there.

Within the LDS church there exists the potential for a wonderful support structure for teenagers with the right Young Women and Young Men's leaders in place. Being a teenager is hard at the best of times, and love and guidance from dedicated leaders can certainly help during those times. However, it only takes a solitary leader, with a "little authority, as they suppose" to exercise unrighteous dominion and give a badly prepared or creepy interview.

After serving on a bishopric, and now as the bishop myself, I've had many opportunities to conduct interviews with the youth of my ward. Below are my own self-imposed rules/guidelines when it comes to these interviews:

1. This interview situation is not the time to develop a relationship with the YM or YW. Those opportunities exist outside of interviews during church activities and lessons. If the only time the YM/YW sees you is in a semi-annual interview, you're doing something wrong.
2. Seek parental consent whenever possible. In many circumstances, especially with younger youth, it may also be appropriate to invite the parent to attend the interview as well if the parent and child are in agreement.
3. Make sure that you are visible to people outside the office during the interview. The bishop's office in our building has a window in the door and my desk is angled in such a way that I can always be seen.
4. Possibly also keep the door ajar, this can be less intimidating to the interviewee and adds reassurance for the parents if not present.
5. If you feel the need to give a worthiness interview, stick to the Temple Recommend questions and don't deviate from them. Also, not all questions may be suitable for all age groups. I've never felt it appropriate to ask a 12 year-old young woman if she keeps the law of chastity.
6. Don't ever, ever probe for a confession to something. Confessions are voluntary and if your questioning is probing in the hope of them "spilling" something, I find that inappropriate and I would frankly class that as child abuse.
7. Don't think you are the only person to resolve any issues that the YM/YW might raise. They are probably more likely to share a concern with a parent or youth leader. Trust that those people help them. I let the YM/YW know that my door is always open if they have an issue they want to discuss and I stand ready to help, but that they shouldn't feel obliged to if they would rather share it with their parent or youth leader.
8. Teach doctrine, not your opinion.
9. Get the youth to interview you. It is sometimes more insightful for both of us if I answer their questions rather than them answering mine.
10. Elder Bednar has taught that "sequence is instructive." Resist the temptation to straight out ask a YM or YW, especially the younger ones, if they are preparing to serve a mission. Before they can serve a mission they need to know the doctrine, gain a testimony and be worthy to attend the temple. So ask how they are doing in seminary and how they are progressing with their Personal Progress/Duty to God awards etc. and teach how those things are important.
11. Interviews should be fun. Keep them as light hearted as possible. It is intimidating enough to be sat in front of a big desk with a suited man without it feeling like a grilling by the FBI. Remember the interview could very well be around the YM/YW's birthday, so don't make them associate their birthday with a grilling from their bishop.

Beyond this, the youth need to be taught what to expect from their interviews with the bishopric. Most importantly they need to be told what to do if they feel the questioning is becoming inappropriate (i.e. leave and tell someone you trust). I think we need to somehow address the power dynamic at play here. In a culture that teaches our youth to defer to authority, how can we teach them, especially the young women, to assert themselves when placed in inappropriate interview situations? In addition to this, bishopric members need the fear of God put into them regarding the consequences of them overstepping the mark when they are interviewing.

Have you been given the responsibility to interview the youth of the church? Do you have any tips or rules that you impose on yourself? When you were a YM/YW what were your positive, or not so positive, interview experiences? Feel free to share your comments and suggestions below ...

Materials Center: You're Doing it Wrong

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by Ben Johnson (bio)

The Vatican Library

One of the first posts I ever wrote for MMM was about being called as the ward librarian. As I mentioned in that post, my testimony was nurtured by the books that I found in the various meetinghouse libraries throughout my mission. I was disappointed to learn that not all libraries had troves of incredible church books. Then, when I got my calling as librarian, I was even more disappointed to learn I'd be in charge of a 'materials center.' How can you be a librarian without a library?

I didn't know this, but they weren't always called materials centers. I recently came across this talk by Howard W. Hunter in 1971 where he introduces a new (correlated?) church library program. From what I can tell, not all meetinghouses has been built with a library, but from then on they were. Then somewhere along the line someone felt guilty about calling a room without books a library and the name was changed to Materials Center.

But one thing stood to me out from Pres. Hunter's talk. He said, "If we are to teach one another, if we are to seek wisdom and learning by study and by faith, we must organize and prepare every needful thing. These words form the basis upon which the idea of the meetinghouse library is conceived—to 'prepare every needful thing' for more effective teaching."

It seems to me that preparing every needful thing goes beyond having some chalk and a map for your lesson. How much more riveting would Sunday School be if your teacher could check out a copy of any of Skousen's Book of Mormon tomes? Or bring to class the library's copy of Rough Stone Rolling by Bushman? Or quote from the dog-eared copy of Givens' By the Hand of Mormon? Or use the library's laptop and projector to hit the Joseph Smith Papers website?

Lets think even bigger. Could the heartbreaking story of Han Mattsson have been different if his ward's library was actually a library with decent church books? What about all the people that go to the web to find some supplement for their lesson and are crushed when they come across polygamy or the priesthood ban or Mountain Meadows for the first time? Would the story be different if they first encountered those concepts at church?

So here's my humble proposal. Let's get rid of answer four and bullet point six and get some good, high-quality books in our libraries. Let's also get some good, high-quality brothers and sisters to staff the library. Brothers and sisters who know church history and love teaching it. Let's turn our libraries into more than a room that dispenses unnecessary coloring pages for primary kids. Let's turn our libraries into libraries.

MMM Sermons: The Merciful Obtain Mercy

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by Saint Mark (bio)

Members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints call them "talks," but most people call them sermons. This is a series of sermons that many Latter-day Saints love and believe. I hope these sermons promote and perfect your faith as they do mine. Read previous MMM Sermons or watch this specific sermon.

I remember growing up with a Mormon friend. He was the only Mormon friend I had that I knew of. I hated spending the night at his house because he didn't have any Coke in the fridge and his family only ate wheat bread, which was an abomination in my home. But, despite the non-Coke, non-white bread home, his home was peaceful and clean and terrifically white. I always remember a large amount of sunlight coming through the windows and bathing the inner rooms and hallways. Further, I remember a poem on the wall of my friend's room. It had the words, of course, but behind the text was a beach scene: a sunrise rising over the waves and an unblemished beach save one set of footprints in the sand. All the years of visiting my friend and staying the night at his house, I never once read that poem. I remember the picture but not one word of it passed by my eyes.

It wasn't until much later, after having joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and becoming a Mormon myself that I finally read my friend's poem known as "Footprints."

One night a man had a dream.
He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Across the sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand; one belonging to him, and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints.
He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life.
This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me."
The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.

Knowing that I had seen this poem for a decade and not read it, I was overwhelmed by its powerful message. In simple terms, this poem by Mary Stevenson touched my soul. But, beyond that generic yet true phrase, I felt an inner understanding that I had searched for my whole life. Why had I survived so many horrors of my youth and could still smile and still feel peace? How could I forgive those who had abused, harmed, or even tried to murder me? How could I be merciful to those who were so unmerciful to me?

My answer lay in this poem's explanation: It was Christ who carried me through the trials of life, not because I merited such service but because he showed me mercy. I was not a Christian as a youth. Far from it. In fact, I was a hedonist and grew-up in a hedonistic household. There was very little that was godly in my home, that praised God, that reinforced His commandments.

Happiness Makes You Unhappy

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by MAB (bio)

So says Garrison Keillor of the Prairie Home Companion radio show. Maybe, like other things in life, if you get too much happiness you become unbalanced. In my experience with lessons at church it seems we occasionally claim that life is easy if you are LDS with a clear plan of happiness and an iron rod to hold on to. But in other lessons we extol the virtue of overcoming trials that are an essential part of life, and maybe as peculiar people we have more than our fair share. Sometimes we preach that God blesses his faithful children, other times we preach that where much is given, much is required - including challenges that may not be fun to overcome. Is it just me or do we have a dichotomous view on happiness and how often we should expect it?

Regardless, I enjoyed Garrison's light hearted take on the subject of happiness in an episode of Lake Wobegon that I recently listened to.

Here are a few lines from the episode:

"Misery makes us happy."

"They (Garrison's relatives) were very happy in Pasadena. They talked about this when they came back. And happiness made them tedious, as it always does."

"Happiness is narcissistic essentially, isn't it. It's sort of infantile."

"Happiness makes you unhappy ... in the end."

But as a general rule you shouldn't read Garrison Keillor, you should listen to the masterful story teller.

The player below should skip to the Lake Wobegon segment at 81:35 when you click the play button.



First time listening to Garrison? You're welcome.

Linger Longer 27

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Linger Longer is a series where we highlight religious and non-religious articles, as well as mormon-related podcasts. Click here for previous lists.

Bloggernacle (religious sites)
A Short History of My Breasts (Feminist Mormon Housewives)
Valuing Families (By Common Consent)
Maybe We're All Right (Times and Seasons)
Impressions of a Girl Lost at Sea (Zelophehad's Daughters)
Do We Take Our Creative Work With Us When We Die? (A Motley Vision)

Mormon Women Authors and Filmmakers Represent with Austenland (Dawning of a Brighter Day)
Is It More Important that the Church Be Important or True? (Wheat & Tares)

"Sadness" (Keepapitchinin)

A Mute in a Monologue (Segullah)

Ride/Walk to the Tokyo Temple (Doves and Serpents)

Women and Comics: Part 1 - The Good (The Exponent)
Understanding Our Differences: Younger Mormons and Leaving the LDS Church (Young Mormon Feminists)

Mormons and the Mythology of the "Greatest Generation" (The Juvenile Instructor)
Doubt and the Dangers of Reading Alone (Faith-Promoting Rumor)

Ghost Stories (Peculiar People)

Mormon Basketball Players' Greatest Hits (Millenial Star)

Ministering on the Spectrum: Primary Helps for Special Education Children (Dandelion Mama)

Cherish One Another (Mormon Women Project)

Teaching About Chastity to the Youth (The Mormon Therapist)

The Miracle of Forgiveness: An Open Letter Requesting Removal or an Update to Reflect Current Knowledge (No More Strangers)

11 Thoughts of a 14-Year Old with ADD During a First Trip to the Sacred Grove (Mormon Tabernacle Enquirer)

Chopping Off Arms is Better than Planning FHE (Rational Faiths)

Mormon-Related Podcasts
Episodes 184-185: Hugh Nibley: Part 1 (Mormon Matters)
Episode 45: Who is Mark Hoffman? Part 3 (Mormon Expositor) Part 1, Part 2

Off-Bloggernacle (non-religious sites)
Random Sneeze Call, Restraining an Airplane and Dropping a Mountain (What If?)
A Little Chat About Religion with the Man Upstairs (The Seattle Times)
40 Signs You Are a BuzzFeed Writer Running Out of List Ideas (Vanity Fair)
How Wonder Works (Aeon)
In America's Pastime, Baseball Players Pass a Lot of Time (The Wall Street Journal)
The Amazing Movie Company Behind 'Sharknado' (Fortune)
A Sneak Peak of the National Grid on Renewables (MIT Technology Review)
Fine Print: Canned Responses for Online Dispute Resolution (@pourmecoffee)
What Does it Even Mean to Believe Something? (Noahpinion)
Why Are Hollywood Movies So Long? (Priceonomics)
The CTFD Method is the Greatest of All Parenting Trends (Jezebel) **graphic language**
The Strange Disappearance of Cooperation in America (Social Evolution Forum)
From Coast to Toast (Vanity Fair)
Robin Thicke, a Romantic, Has a Naughty Hit (The New York Times)
Why Millennials Are Leaving the Church (CNN Belief Blog)
You Can Live Forever (The Daily Beast)
16 Words That Are Much Older Than They Seem (Mental Floss)
What if Mitt Romney Had Won? (The Economist)
The Cheat Code to Life (Wired)
Your Smile Can Change the World (The Guardian)
How to Trick Your Brain Into Banishing Bad Money Habits (LifeHacker)
Incredibly Detailed Close-Ups of Van Gogh's Masterpieces (Twisted Sifter)
Woody Allen's Distinctive Female Characters (The New York Times)
Your Dog Will Not Like DogTV (Slate)
How Not to Be Alone (The New York Times)

Rethinking Mormonism's Racial Narrative: Questions for Russell Stevenson

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by Scott Hales (bio)

Several books about the little-known, little-understood history of black Latter-day Saints have hit bookstores and e-readers this year, including two revised volumes of Margaret Young and Darius Gray's Standing on the Promises novel series (published by Zarahemla books) and W. Kesler Jackson's Elijah Abel: The Life and Times of a Black Priesthood Holder (published by Cedar Fort).

The latest from this group is Russell Stevenson's Black Mormon: The Story of Elijah Ables, which is now available for the Kindle. I had the chance recently to ask Russell a few questions about his book. Here's what he had to say:

Scott Hales: For those who don't know, who was Elijah Ables? What makes him an important figure in Church history?

Russell Stevenson: In some ways, this is the question. That he existed at all forces the Mormon people to revisit—and probably overturn—their assumptions about Mormonism's racial narrative.

Elijah Ables was an African-American man born in western Maryland. Census numbers suggest that he was a slave at one point, though we can't be certain of that. As a young man, he left Maryland and made his way to the river city of Cincinnati where he came into contact with Mormonism. He joined the Mormons in September of 1832 and went to Kirtland in 1836 where he was ordained an Elder. Later documentation suggests that he was ordained "under the hand of Joseph the Martyr" (Eunice Kinney, Letter to Wingfield Watson, July 5, 1885). He served a mission to Canada, lived in Nauvoo, served a prolonged mission in Cincinnati where was later ordained to be a Seventy. Ables was one of the highest ranking leaders in the branch. Ables came to Utah in 1853 and stayed committed to the faith for the remainder of his life.

SH: Generally, in Church histories, Elijah Ables is known as Elijah Abel. Why favor this less common variation of his name?

RS: This is perhaps the most commonly-asked question. The short answer is that "Ables" is the earliest documentary evidence of a signature (from a letter to Brigham Young) that can be credibly traced to Elijah's own person. There is later evidence—an invoice—that suggests an "Able" spelling. However, his name was spelled in every conceivable way in the nineteenth-century: Able, Ables, Abel, and Abels.

SH: What does Black Mormon reveal about Elijah Ables that other studies of his life do not? How does your research change what we know about the man and his work?

RS: The few works there have been on Elijah's life have been very "Mo-centric," relying exclusively on Mormon sources and placing him within a Mormon context. But no one has ever been so one-dimensional. My work suggests that Elijah was a socially agile figure--capable of navigating a number of contexts. Whether he lived in the urban black community of East Cincinnati, the runaway slave population of Upper Canada, or the heavily Yankee scene of northern Ohio, Ables had to work with a wide variety of social networks, each with distinctive values and cultural systems. There are government documents and contemporary correspondence illustrating how Elijah Ables helped the Saints escape a rebellion in Upper Canada. Some of the earlier works do not address Elijah's commitment to upholding the institutional church, even when he was clashing with some of its highest leaders.

Giveaway 30: Winner

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Seattle Jon lives a few blocks from one of the few Deseret Industries outside of Utah. With fewer members around to pick over church books, he is constantly buying ... sometimes without realizing he already owns what he's buying. For this giveaway, he is again dipping into his private collection to send the winner below the following gently used church books.

Joseph Smith as Scientist, John A. Widtsoe, 1997 Edition (read reviews)

It's You and Me, Lord!, Alan G. Cherry, 1974 Edition (read reviews or MMM posts)

The Discourses of Wilford Woodruff, Wilford Woodruff & G. Homer Durham, 1969 Edition (read reviews)
The Message of the Joseph Smith Papyri: An Egyptian Endowment, Hugh Nibley, 1976 Edition (read reviews)

And the winner is: Devin F (see comment)

Please respond via email with your address by Friday, August 30th to claim the books.